Sunday, September 5, 2010

Going Pigeon: Brewers at Phillies - 9/5/10: djpigeon@comcast.net





Pre-game:
Chris the Naked Emperor Wheeler mentions that struggling starting pitcher Kyle Kendrick could benefit from Milwaukee's right-heavy batting order.

Wheeler: "(Milwaukee) does not have a lot of left-handed hitters in their lineup, so mabye that can help him"
Pigeon: "But the left-handed slugger they do have is a BIG FAT PROBLEM"

Top 1st:
GOING PIGEON PRESENTS: TRAGIC NEWS
At 1:39 PM Chris Wheeler mentioned that home plate umpire Jim Joyce missed a call early in the season and cost Detroit Tiger pitcher Armando Gallaraga a perfect game.
At 1:39 PM in a paralell universe, Bizarro Superman threw a Dong Feng-15 SRBM short range ballistic missle into the headquarters of the Daily Planet in Metroplolis.  Estimated loss of life is 1,500.  The home of the legenday paper is now a smoking crater.

With one out and runners on 2nd and 3rd folloiwng a Ryan Braun double, Prince Jabba the Hut Fielder steps to the plate.  The left-handed slugger is sporting a sexy pair of shades.

On the planet Tatooine, a huge Prince Fielder fan with MLB Season Ticket likes what he sees.
Jabba the Hutt: "I shall dispatch Bobo Fett to acquire me a pair of those sunglasses".

Carlos Ruiz lapses into a George Custer moment and decides Kendrick should challenge the dead-pull hitting Fielder with an 87-mph inside fastball. 
The ball reaches the 2nd deck faster than Bizzaro Superman's Dong Feng Missile

Bottom 1st: MIL 3 - PHI 0
Chase Utley and Placido Polanco send line singles to center-field with one out.  Ryan Howard grounds into a 4-6-3 DP on a 68-mph curve, but the Phils appear to be swinging the bats well.

Bottom 2nd: MIL 3 - PHL 0
With the count 2-2, Jayson Werth shortens his swing nicely and lobs a leadoff double into left-center.
Ben Francsicso sits on a 68-mph curve and tomahawks a single to left.

In one of his classic 'hunch' moves, Charlie Manuel starts Carlos Ruiz in the matinee because of his sold numbers aginst Randy Wolf.
The Beast doens't disappoint as he slams a two-run double into the left-field corner.

After two innings, Wolf has thrown 44 pitches.

Top 3rd: MIL 3- PHL 2
In typical Kyle Kendrick fashion, the righthander is unable to retire Rickie Weeks after getting ahead 0-2.  The leadoff hitter pokes a single past Utley's glove into center field.
Corey Hart slaps a hot grounder past Polanco and into the left field corner to score the speedy Weeks.

Bottom 3rd: MIL 4 - PHL 2
The Phils patient approach to Wolf continues as Utley bats down a high Wolf fastball for a single to center.
But as Wolf hits the 50-pitch mark with no one out in the third, the heart of the Phils lineup goes brain-dead.

Polanco: tries to pull 2-0 87-mph outside fastball and pops weekly to Fielder
Howard: tries to pull first pitch 76-mph curveball and pops weekly to McGhee
Werth: swings through 87-mph Nirto Zone fastball and strikes out.

Top 4th: MIL 4 - PHI 2
With one out, reserve catcher George Kottaras brings his .205 batting average to the plate.
Kyle Kendrick brings a 88-mph E.L. Fudge cookie to the plate.
Kottaras closes his eyes and swings HARD, aunching a towering drive off the wall in right-center.
After getting Wolf to ground into the second out, Kendrick has a chance to get out of the inning.
But in typical Kyle Kendrick fashion, the righthander is unable to retire Rickie Weeks after getting two strikes, intead hanging an 87-mph sinker that Weeks strokes for an RBI single.

Bottom 5th: MIL 5 - PHL 2
With a little luck, Randy Wolf escapes potential disaster in the Phils 5th.  After Rollins reaches on a leadoff error by Escobar, Chase Utley scolds a line drive at Prince Fielder for a double play.
Polando extends the inning with a walk, but Jim Joyce calls a high 1-0 curve ball for strike one, changing Howard's approach and setting up an inning-ending strikeout.

Bottom 6th: MIL 5 - PHI 2
With no outs and the bases empty, Jayson Werth swings at a low and inside Wolf fastball and sends a fly ball to the fence where Corey Hart makes the catch.
This can only be described as STUPID BASEBALL.  Jayson Werth's job here should be to get on base and make Wolf throw pitches so the Phils can get him out of the game.  With Wolf on the mound, Ryan Howard is uesless and Raul Ibanez and Domonic Brown remain glued to the Phils bench.
Even if Werth goes yard, the Phils are still down two runs and Wolf has only thrown once pitch. 
Rant off.

Bottom 8th: MIL 5 - PHL 2
Righthanded reliever John Axford pitches a very strange inning for the Brewers.
Polanco (bats right): strike, ball, groundout.
Howard (bats left): ball, ball, ball, ball, BB
Werth (bats right): strike, strike, strike, K
Victorino (bats left): ball, ball, ball, ball, BB
With lefties Domonic Bown and Raul Ibanez available to pinch-hit and Axford unable to throw a single strike to a left-handed batter, Manuel inexplicibly leaves right-handed Ben Francisco in to hit with two outs.
Francisco (bats right): strike, strike, ball, ball, foul, ball, foul, fly out to RF.

Final score: Brewers 6 - Phillies 2
Final score in Miami: Marlins 7 - Braves 6 (10 inn.)

If the Phils had to lose, this was the time to do it.  Kendrick pitched poorly and the Braves lost.

I am Don Pigeon and I am OUT!!!

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